The OTHER Worst Case Scenario Survival Handbook: A Parody (Anniversary Edition)

Welcome to the anniversary edition of the greatest parody EVER.  The most important book you will read in your life time!  The longest title in recorded history!  The thing for which the word “hyperbole” was invented!

Are we getting carried away?  Perhaps a little!

Where can I get this marvelous thing?

We are so glad you asked! It is available in e-book format from Amazon and Smashwords, with new sales outlets opening up regularly.  And it’s only $4.99!  Less than a really expensive cup of coffee!  Less than it costs to feed a starving refugee somewhere!  Probably!

What you get

You get the things you really need to know, that’s what!  In fact, because we like keeping you informed, here is a full table of contents:

Part one: Breaking in and Breaking Out

• How to Shoplift
• How to Rob a Bank
• How to Break Into a Car
• How to Escape from Prison
• How to Get Into Heaven
• How to Split the Atom
• How to Avoid a Speeding Ticket
• How to Survive A Home Invasion
• How to Hide Weapons of Mass Destruction
• How to Survive a Hurricane

Part Two: On Not Getting Eaten or Otherwise Permanently Damaged

• How to Survive a Shark Attack
• How to Fend Off an Attack From an Extra-Dimensional Invader From the Planet Nebulon Four
• How to Fend Off a Squirrel
• How to Get Away From a Bear
• How to Tell When Your Dog is Rabid
• How to Deal With Foreigners
• How to Avoid Alien Abduction
• How to Survive a Bad Movie
• How to Deal With a Cat Infestation

Part Three: Suicidal Tendencies

• How to Jump to Your Death
• How to Drink and Drive
• How to Start a Militia
• How to Conjure Up a Demon
• How to Reach the Summit of Mt. Everest
• How to Tell if Your Husband Is In the Mafia
• How to Streak During a Major League Baseball Game
• How to Cross a Busy Street
• How to Start Smoking
• How to Lose Weight

Part Four: Emergencies R Us

• How to Identify and Defuse a Bomb
• How to Make Coffee After Running Out of Coffee Filters
• How to Deliver a Baby In a Manger
• How to Prepare a Human Being for Emergency Consumption
• How to Perform an Appendectomy
• How to Tell You’ve Lost the Election
• How to Find Jesus
• How to Treat a Broken Heart
• How to Identify Anthrax
• How to Identify Yourself as White Trash

Part Five: Surviving When You Should Really Just Die

• How to Live Through the Sinking of an Ocean Liner That Has Struck an Iceberg
• How to Survive a Trip to Disney World
• How to Survive On the Moon
• How to Avoid Getting Struck By Lightning
• How to Determine If Your Neighbor is a Serial Killer
• How to Take a Bullet
• How to Survive a U.S. Bombing Raid
• How to Survive a Major League Baseball Strike
• How to Locate Hidden Weapons of Mass Destruction

But is it actually funny?

Good question!  Yes it is!  It’s really funny!  Really, really!  Here are some sample chapters to give you a taste…

How to Reach the Summit of Mount Everest

How to Deliver A Baby in A Manger